Think positive and always look on the bright side. Focus on what you want. Whatever you think about the universe will send your way. Your thoughts become things.

Rubbish.

I have consistently focused on a new car (whilst still cherishing the old one for continuing to start each day) for the last 4 years and I still haven’t got one. How long specifically does it take for a thought to manifest itself into a thing?

And what then of all of the so called negative thoughts I have on a day to day basis? If I think “I should put my seat belt on incase I crash” am I manifesting a crash for the future which I then need to take responsibility for, because I thought it and brought it into my awareness?

I remember once teaching a room full of NLP Practitioners & Master Practitioners and giving them ‘Rules For The Room’, which was a list of “whilst in the room do not do this…” Two People on the course objected to the “don’t do this…” list because they felt it wasn’t very NLP to focus on what we didn’t want.

The truth is though there are plenty of times when knowing what you do not want is as important (if not more so) than what you do want.

I do not want to ever experience a plane crash, but I am glad someone has dedicated their lifes work into formulating the plans of what steps to take should one occur. Did that person die in a plane crash as a result of thinking about them so much? What about hair dressers who mix hair colours in a particular way because they want to avoid giving the customer green or orange hair. Does it happen because they are thinking about it?

Do the people who fit abs breaks continuously drive into lamp posts when they’re on the road?

Knowing what you need to avoid can be both useful and important. More than that it is sometimes the driver for diverting you towards what you do want instead. Sometimes people forget the final step of being diverted to what they want and this is obviously a problem. But if there is a clear balance between what you don’t want and what you do, then this should keep the affirmations positive but importantly realistic too.

What does an NLPer say when their child is about to run out in front of a bus?

“That’s a lovely walking style to make it even better when crossing the road, wait until the bus is passed but overall it is lovely to see you being so independent”

Whereas most others say “Stop!” “Don’t cross when there is a bus coming or you will get run over!” The NLPers will all be worrying about the unconscious not processing the negatives in the sentence but there are times when we must focus on what to avoid. Back it up with details about what you want and feed back positively when you see it. Don’t rule out the away froms. Being negative isn’t always negative (especially if it is backed up with a positive).