Bet you were hoping that I was going to offer some magic pill that you could take to make it all better, well sorry, it doesn’t work like that. The thing is, there is nothing that can stop you from suffering from depression, except you. You might not like this much, but it’s the truth, and that’s why I’m going to tell it to you anyway.
Your depression isn’t caused by the partner you have or the one you don’t have or the one that left you. It isn’t your job or your kids or the way you were bought up. It isn’t caused by your abuse or your dysfunctional family or your weight. None of these are the cause of your depression. You are. Think about it, throughout your depression, what has been the one constant, remaining factor? You.
Have you ever caught a cold? I’m sure you have. Colds are picked up from outside of us, we inhale them, ingest them, then they grow and make us feel like crap. But you don’t get depression in this way. Depression isn’t something you get, it’s something you do, it’s a process. That tells you can, if you know how to, choose not to do it. Yes it’s a choice. Sorry to all of you who were hoping that the answer would come from somewhere, a packet of pills or a doctor or a counsellor, it won’t. It won’t because you already have it, you already the expertise to cure yourself. You just have to know how to use it. And no amount of drugs, or talking about your “problems” are going to help you find it. You need re educating, you need to learn another way.
Yes it’s a choice, I know you’re questioning that part, thinking “well I obviously wouldn’t choose to feel like this.” Here’s the thing, you’ve done it so much, you’ve got good at it. Congratulations, you’ve become a master at depressing yourself. You’re hard wired to go there now, it’s automatic, like a habit, it’s almost as if you have no control over it at all. But you can and you will.
I know you’ve tried to change, you tried to fight it, using all of your will power. But making changes to the unconscious using will power is not at all easy, it’s a battle. However, making changes to the unconscious is in fact easy, when you know how to do it, or when you meet someone who’s good enough to do it for you.
If you are absolutely committed to changing, I mean totally committed, you can change so quickly. You can change in a day. I promise you, it’s true, I’ve seen it happen, I’ve experienced it myself. It wasn’t cheap and it wasn’t all that easy, but if you pay cheap you pay twice, if it’s as easy to do, it’s easy to forget. If you want to change and you are absolutely committed to doing it, you can do it, you can change in a day.
I don’t know what you want from life, I don’t know how your life will be different when you’ve stopped depressing yourself, but I can tell you that it will be completely worth the investment. How much money do you waste each year on warranties, that cost as much as the product you’ve bought, or paying fees that could have been avoided, or putting your money in the wrong savings account, or taking a holiday that you didn’t enjoy? When would now be a good time to invest in yourself? Invest into who you are as a person so that you can grow and feel good about being the worthwhile person that you truly are?
Everybody has experienced the loss of someone or something that they care for, and for me, this highlights the necessity for us to live our lives to the full, to live happy and free. For every person that ever told you that you’re not worth it, I’m here to tell you now that you are, to tell you that you can be and will be wonderfully happy and free, so what’s the one thing you need to commit to doing for yourself to let yourself know you are worth it, you are worth ever penny of that change.
Someone once told me that success is the greatest form of revenge. Now I’m not saying that you have anything to prove to anyone, but when you change, when you do it for yourself in this way, you will surprise a lot of people who expected little else from you, and that’s a really great feeling.
You can change in a day, make a turning point.
By Gemma Bailey