Johann Hari once said, “The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection.”
This powerful idea was proven in an experiment with rats. In solitary cages, rats were given a choice between regular water and water laced with cocaine. Tragically, many chose the cocaine. But when placed in a “rat park” filled with other rats, toys, and stimulation, more than 90% of them chose clean water instead.
It teaches us something painful but vital – when we feel isolated, addiction thrives. When we feel connected, addiction loses its grip.
Why Connection Has Never Been More Important
Today, we have more ways to connect than ever before. Video calls, instant messaging, global social networks – and yet loneliness is epidemic. Research shows that chronic loneliness increases your risk of death by 26% and is as deadly as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. 😟
It’s not enough to virtually connect. Humans are wired for real human interaction. We need to feel the presence of another person, hear the tone of their voice in real life, and physically experience the comfort of their touch.
The rise in addictions – from alcohol to technology – can often be traced back to this: a lack of deep, meaningful connection. And it’s a loss we feel in our bones.
🌟 “Physical connection triggers the release of vital hormones like dopamine and serotonin – our bodies need real-life interactions to stay healthy and whole.” 🌟
How to Create Real Connection in a Disconnected World
One simple but profound tip I learned on a personal development course (and I wish I could remember who to credit!) was this: if you want to change something, give it Project Status.
That means making it a high priority and pouring all your “lost time” into it. And let’s be honest – we are experts at losing time. 😬 We waste it scrolling social media, dithering over breakfast choices, collapsing in front of a screen for “wind down” time that doesn’t really rejuvenate us.
If you start reclaiming even half of your lost hours, you could easily win back half a day each week. Imagine the difference that could make. Use that reclaimed time to reconnect:
Arrange spontaneous coffee dates with friends.
Take your partner out for an impromptu dinner.
Spend unstructured, genuine time with your kids – not taxiing them between clubs, but truly being with them.
These moments aren’t just nice – they are crucial. They heal us. They ground us. They protect us from addiction and despair.
“Be the person who makes eye contact, who laughs freely, who shows up for others – not just online, but in real life.”
How This Links to Building Emotional Health – And to Our Coaching Franchise
In People Building, we talk a lot about the importance of emotional resilience and meaningful life skills. It’s not theory – it’s the heartbeat of what we teach.
Our coaching franchise practitioners know that thriving isn’t just about surviving the day – it’s about feeling truly alive, and helping others to do the same. Through our coaching franchise, we give people the tools to rebuild their own emotional health, while teaching others to create better, stronger connections too.
If you’ve ever longed to make a real difference, to go beyond the surface and change lives for good, our coaching franchise could be your calling.
Your Challenge – Audit Your Lost Time
Here’s what I want you to do: Audit your life.
Find where your time is being wasted – your dead time – and reclaim it. Choose one person or one group to spend real, meaningful time with. Prioritise them.
And one month from now, I want you to tell me how your life has changed. 🌟 Because I promise you – it will.
by Gemma Bailey (with the help of Ai)
